July 15, 2010 - Mike and Kim share their story of healing. She had the affair.
Mike and Kim's Story: (transcript begins)
Brian: Mike and Kim are a younger couple, that we’ve had the privilege of having as mentors on our team for a year now, but we’ve had a connection with them indirectly for about 7 years. They come from the west coast so their laid back attitude is okay. We met them in December of 2008 in Dallas when they came to the Healing from Affairs seminar. So Mike and Kim welcome!
Kim: I got the go ahead from Mike to be the one to speak first. We are from west coast Canada, We have 2 boys, ages 13 and 11. We've been married for 16 years. I had the opportunity to read Brian and Anne’s book, before I whose to disclose my affair to Mike. I kept my affair a secret for 5 years. I remained in contact with my affair partner for a brief time, and then ended it completely. I knew I needed to disclose to my husband what had happened.
The night I finally disclosed my affair, Mike had just said something to me, something about the direction he wanted his life to go. He said something like, "I think I should pray for cancer, to get me closer to God." That hurt me. Then I asked, "what if it was something worse than cancer?" He said, "what could be worse than cancer?" Then I got down on my knees on the bed in front of him, and confessed the affair.
I had taken away all of my husband’s choices by not telling him about the affair. So we had to start at the beginning as if I had just had the affair that day. I had the tools from the book, My Husband’s Affair Became the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me, which really helped. Still I didn’t do everything perfectly. Mike was very upset and broken. We didn’t actually go to the Healing from Affairs seminar until 1.5 years later. Mike reached a point where he said, “I can’t do this anymore.” No one knew about our situation. When he said he was done, I asked him if he would consider attending Healing from Affairs. Mike accepted. Going to the conference is what saved our marriage.
To hear the rest of Mike and Kim's story, and lots of insight for healing a marriage after an affair, especially when the wife had the affair, click on the audio link above and start listening now. (You can also download it to your device, if you prefer!)