Beyond Affairs Passionate Life Logo

Beyond Affairs Network Support Groups

(Para leer esta informacion en Español, haga clic aqui.)

Beyond Affairs Network (BAN) is a grass roots organization made up of local support groups for people who are dealing with the devastating impact of a spouse’s affair. It is for women and men (still married or divorced) seeking support in recovering from this experience. 

Please note! BAN is not for those who have ever had an affair themselves.

Please note! BAN is a support group ONLY FOR THE BETRAYED SPOUSE … If a couple is working to restore their marriage after an affair, when the betrayed attends BAN, both spouses benefit.

BAN is a recipient of the 2008 Smart Marriages Impact Award. This award is given for programs which are having the biggest impact in America and around the world for strengthening marriages, families and individuals.

Here are the words as they appear on the award itself:

To the program that protects the flame of marriage through the darkest, coldest and most storm-ravaged nights – and through the wisdom and generositiy of those that have been there and made it back – provides the shelter, comfort, and support that allows couples to not only heal, but to grow even stronger in the broken places. – San Francisco, July 2008

* Please note that BAN supports betrayed spouses who may be facing divorce as well as those who are reconciling their marriages.

Click here to listen to a teleseminar about BAN
BAN – Beyond Affairs Network. This teleseminar is for every person who is affected by affairs, whether you are a betrayed spouse, the spouse who had the affair, or a professional/support person assisting a couple or individual in healing. Listening is a great way to learn all about BAN. (The first few minutes of the teleseminar there is some static on the line. Just keep listening. It gets clear about 15 minutes into the call.)

Beyond Affairs Network (BAN) Mission Statement

To provide an opportunity for people who are dealing with the devastating impact of a spouse’s affair to come together face-to-face, for strength, insight, and mutual support.

To provide a safe place to share the painful emotions that interfere with recovery and a place to gain perspective and understanding, aimed at thinking more clearly and acting more effectively, in order to proactively move forward, make more informed personal decisions and recover from this experience.

To reinforce people’s own efforts toward recovery, working in conjunction with and not in place of other support they are seeking such as therapy, counseling or marriage healing and strengthening seminars.

To help people reach a point where they are fully healed from the experience and no longer need support.

To become as commonly known about and available worldwide as other major support groups such as Al-Anon, so that no betrayed spouse needs to suffer in isolation.

BAN is not for those who have ever had an affair themselves.
Also…please note that BAN is ONLY for meetings, NOT just email contact.
Disclaimer: BAN is not a replacement for counseling or other professional help.
Again…please note that BAN is NOT for those ONLY seeking email contact.

It’s for those interested in attending meetings.
Who can become a member of BAN?
--BAN is for people who are dealing with a spouse’s affair.
–BAN is for both women and men.
–BAN is for people who are either still married or divorced.
–BAN is NOT for those who have had an affair themselves (no spouses attending).
–BAN is NOT for counselors (unless personally dealing with their spouse’s affair).
–BAN is NOT for members of the media.
The purpose of BAN is to provide an opportunity for people who are dealing with a partner’s affair to come together for strength, insight, and mutual support. It is best suited for individuals who are seeking to gain more information, understanding and perspective about the issue of affairs in order to make more informed personal decisions.

BAN is an all-volunteer, free, grass-roots organization. Since there are no guarantees as to the uniform motivation and commitment of those who participate, the integrity of each group is the joint responsibility of all the members.

BAN Support Groups exist only in cities where someone has volunteered to serve as the local coordinator. Information about the role of the coordinator (with a link to the Sign-up Form for volunteering), can be found under “Coordinators” below.

Cities with BAN Chapters (or which are currently organizing chapters), along with the e-mail address of the coordinator for each city, are on the “List of Cities” (see link below).

Please read all the following information about BAN – in order to get an overview of the facts related to establishing Local BAN Chapters.

Backstory (BAN’s beginnings, including my personal story)
The Need for BAN (excerpted from “The Monogamy Myth”)
BAN Guidelines (includes Guidelines for Participation and Interaction)
Coordinators (role, Website support, and SIGN-UP FORM to become a Coordinator)
List of Cities (including e-mail address of local coordinators)

(Some basic information about BAN is also available in Word format in The BAN Book)

To learn more about BAN by watching an interview with a Beyond Affairs Network Coordinator
click on the question that interests you below.
To watch these interviews, you will need Quicktime Player installed on your computer.
To download a free version of Quicktime Player click here.

What is BAN?
How did you discover BAN?
What advice would you give to someone who is hesitant to join BAN?
What made you decide to be a BAN coordinator?
What’s the greatest lesson you’ve learned from the affair?

Next Read: Backstory (BAN’s beginnings, including my personal story)